Well, a personal spongechronicity, anyway:

I read this comic (which I did not at all understand) while I was in Manhattan today, having gone in to buy tickets for my wife and me, our sons. and their girlfriends to see Spongebob Squarepants the Musical.

TicketMaster was charging almost $80 in fees for six tickets, by the way: How is this not considered scalping? We’re not talking about the premium they charge for had-to-get tickets (even though Ticketmaster is often the reason tickets are hard to find), which is a separate matter: these are literally the same tickets I was able to buy at the box office.

Anyway, y’all are here for the comic, not to hear me rant about Ticketmaster:


Added 10 minutes later:

Okay, now it’s getting weird (even though I suspect those are supposed to be pieces of Swiss cheese rather than little Spongebobs: I really don’t have a clue what the Off the Mark is all about either, so I guess we get another bonus CIDU this evening)

mark sponges



  1. Is the first comic here as a CIDU as well? If so, I think the entirety of the joke is that he’s calling them sponges, and they’re literally sponges.

  2. Yeah, I was quite puzzled by the Off The Mark when I read it, as I took them to be Spongebobs of some sort. But the maze finally led me to a conclusion like Kevin’s at 1.

  3. I am familiar with the expression that someone is a sponge, or they sponge off of you, meaning that you are paying their way. Aunt and Uncle stayed for three days (not long if you ask me), you are buying their food and supplying a free place to stay. Like a leech. Sponge, soaking up stuff and not paying for it. Maybe it’s a regional or generational thing. And in this case they also look like sponges.
    The other one, as explained above, cheeses are in a maze. The previous tenant was eaten by lab rats.

  4. The vertical lines on the arms, legs, and heads were very puzzling, until I figured out that they were supposed to indicate a rectangular cross section for the sponge appendages. This would have worked better if the perpendicular sides had been shaded differently.
    P.S. Billybob has a good point, but I think the artist just forgot when to stop drawing holes onto skin.

  5. TicketMaster is the most useless company I can think of – they are the quintessential middle-man that adds nothing but cost to a transaction. Maybe in the 80s or 90s it was nice to have an 800 number to call to buy tickets for shows not near you without having to drive to the distant theater’s box office and the theaters could sell tickets more broadly without having to worry about dealing with out of town checks or credit cards. But in 2018 any rinkie-dink theater can do all of that themselves on the Web without a lot of trouble.

    Would you believe that at one point TicketMaster charged you a fee in order to print your tickets at home on your own printer? No charge for them to print and mail them but a fee for you to print it yourself.

  6. Winter, if that is the whole joke — and it’s probably meant to be, though I’m not sure what the funny part’s supposed to be — why do Aunt and Uncle each have four arms and legs and faces that seem to be peeling off? And why are they drawn as people suffering from Smallpox rather than looking like, you know, Spongebob Squarepants? Or at least pieces of Swiss cheese?

  7. And to make it worse, theatres no longer sell tickets themselves, other than in the box office in the lobby (and not always), giving Ticketmaster a virtual monopoly..

    I can foresee an end to box office sales altogether, in favor of a Ticketmaster kiosk in the lobby.

  8. When I saw the second one, I thought of that book that everybody was so crazy about a few years ago “Who Moved The Cheese”. But I think the previous cheese having been eaten makes more sense.

  9. ” any rinkie-dink theater can do all of that themselves on the Web without a lot of trouble.”

    When you see the long, long list of companies… big ones… that have suffered significant data breaches in recent years… is that truly what you want?

  10. J.P., are you trying to say it’s preferable for your data to be in the hands of a big company like Ticketron than in the hands of “rinkie-dink” theatres?

  11. The problem here is that the chunks of Swiss cheese look a lot more like sponges than the aunt and uncle do.

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